At one point today, right after lunch and before entering the church for the Stations of the Cross, while waiting for the boys during their 'bathroom break', it dawned on me that 7 years ago today found me leaving my 15 month old boys with their grandma and heading to a doctor's appointment, while Micah went to an orthodontist appointment. I had found this bizarre lump and just made an appointment because that is what you do. It was a Wednesday and we were supposed to be in Mississippi by Friday afternoon for a missions conference with the rest of our team. The doctor did an exam and immediately sent me over for an ultrasound, which turned in to an immediate mammogram (fortunately for me, the only one I will ever have to endure). Sometime between the ultrasound and mammogram, Micah came and joined me--my appointments lasting much longer than his and certainly longer than we dreamed they would. After the mammogram, the radiologist and the tech (her name was Becky, by the way, and she still says hi to me and gives me a hug when I see her) came out and talked to me, telling me that there were what looked like calcifications (which I know now is never a good thing) and that they were recommending me to a surgeon for a biopsy. Looking back now, I saw it in their eyes--the diagnosis they knew was coming. We walked down the hallway and met Micah's dad in the highway outside the doctor's lounge where he gave me a a hug and told me he was sorry and I said..'for what? we don't know anything yet.'
Who knew that exactly 7 years later I would be finishing up teaching my second year of school, my heart full to bursting at the goodness and grief over the Friday that we call Good? That Micah would be finishing his first year of residency as a doctor? That we would be at home in Oklahoma? That those 7 years would have been filled with some of the best of the best moments and also some of the darkest of the dark? I certainly didn't, but I have been reminded over and over in recent weeks of the fact that God knew and while we may never understand the reasons for the journey that we are on, we can always always trust Him.
Our school has celebrated Passion Week by reading through the Life of Christ in the book of Matthew, celebrating the Lord's Supper together yesterday, and reflecting on His trial and crucifixion today. I am looking forward to Sunday morning and celebrating our risen Lord.
|2nd Grade Easter Egg hunt--look at my tall boys!|